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I’ll call you later…I’ll call you back. I’ll call you later…I’ll call you back. This is what he use to say to me. And it was ok with me. Until it wasn’t. This was really less than the bare minimum. But men and ‘em seem to think this is enough. I guess it can be if it was actually done. Yet the texts became less and the calls grew even further between. I mean if he knew he had no intentions of staying, what was the point of playing with someone who didn’t want to be played with. Now I’m caught in a whirlwind of emotions because this nigga wanted to do some ego stroking. -L' Mo

Scoreboard

He claims chicks only want him for sex, then they’re on to the next. They say he really isn’t the relationship type. What might bring them to this conclusion? To be honest it’s quite confusing. He looks good, slightly hood, with a couple college degrees under his belt. Got a smile that can make your heart melt. When he steps into a room, he commands attention. What am I missing? Why wouldn’t a chick want that?! Well here’s the facts…All the shit he said, was him projecting. It’s easier to be a sex toy than toyed with. He’s very competitive, so when it comes to matters of the heart, he’s not losing. He refuses to fall in love. -L’ Mo

Lessons

I wonder if parents know the trauma and pain they inflict on their child. Shits wild because the shit that means nothing to you, means everything to them. I remember sitting on the curb, waiting on my dad to come pick me up for the weekend. He never came. My 1st everlasting pain. 1st dose of abandonment and rejection....I’ve never really liked that lesson. I’m learning it still. Surely not by choice but this lesson itself has altered my decision making. I can’t tell who’s faking or making a fool of me. Maybe no one is faking and I’m making a fool of myself. See what I’m talking about. This battle is a no win situation. A constant confrontation. Between heart & mind. -L’ Mo

Hurt

Everyday the thought of you will become less and less. Everyday the thought of you I will be less of a mess from crying over you. I never knew this would be this hard. All while with you, I wanted to be apart. Now I just want to be a... part... of your daily routine. Who knew I’d miss the little things. Little things like the good morning text. The late night sex. A call or a text just to check on how my day was going. Although you never knowing I wanted out! Not cause of you, but really because of me. I needed to heal. And I knew it wouldn’t get accomplished while involved with you. So I did what I do best. I sabotaged the relationship. I never meant to hurt you. I put that on everything I love. But pain isn’t fair when it comes to love. Doesn’t matter who did what part. All that’s irrelevant when it comes to matters of the heart. Doesn’t really matter who’s to blame. Because at the end of it all, we both feel the same. Hurt. -L’ Mo

Mommas Boy

Mommas boy, mommas boy. Everybody says that’s mommas joy. But in this particular case that’s mommas toy. She plays with his emotions at will. He accepts what she’s giving as long as he can feel. Feel some kind of love. Any kind of compassion. All of his life, that’s all he’s been asking. She’s never really given it to him though, but she gives it to his son. And all he’s ever wondered is what has he done. What did he do to deserve such pain. Maybe she blames him and she’s ashamed. Maybe she blames him for becoming a teen mother. Maybe she blames him cause his father moved on to another. Maybe she blames him for not succeeding in life. Maybe blaming him makes it easier to sleep at night. But by no means does this make it right. It does on the other hand makes for a clearer sight. Same age, same height those women are his type. Couldn’t get it at home, so he sought it from others. All this boy has really been looking for is A mother. -L’ Mo

Dazed

She’s excited to have a man and finally be claimed. But the shit she accepts from this dude is hella insane! I mean he gets other calls from chicks and be switching it up. Claiming oh girl is just a friend, meanwhile he really trying to fuck. Be telling her he’s going to hang with the guys...that’s really code for about to get in between some thighs. She went through his phone & read all the text...so she knows he’s still sleeping with his ex. She also knows about all the other hoes. But she don’t really care because she’s the one he chose... -L’ Mo

Pretender

I expected your loyalty yet I never received your honesty. Honestly that was pretty stupid of me. Ya see you can't really have one without the other. And another thing, it seemed we had a really good thing but you kept searching for ...whatever. Whatever it may have been it brought whatever we had to an end. As you kept saying she's just an old friend, never knew you were so good at pretend. Even pretended that you loved me. But it never was me. It's always been her. -L' Mo

Kin

We use to be really good friends, but word on the street is I stole her man. The only question is, how? We hung out for months yet she never mentioned they got down. She never mentioned that he was on her team. To do that deliberately I'd be considered mean. I mean, had I known I would have stayed clear. Maybe she never told me out of fear. Fear that I'd tell her next. Now that I think about it, he has the same last name as "our" Ex. -L' Mo

Writer Blocked

I remember a time when writing eased my soul. So easy it was for words to unfold. But as of lately it tears my heart. Every alphabet written tearing me apart. As I write I'm forced to face my truth. Lords knows that's not something I'm willing to do. Right now I just want to live in my little bubble of pain. Nothing to lose. Nothing to gain. Kind of on auto pilot coasting from one day to the next. But now I can't help but wonder what's next... -L' Mo

Fight or Flight

I've been told that if it's worth it, it's worth fighting for. But what happens when you see signs you can't ignore, like empty condom boxes on the floor? Is that worth fighting for? Do you set your pride aside and let it ride? Or do you confront the issue, only to end up with tissues wiping your tears? Both fears being exposed, he's doing wrong & you'll soon be alone. Is this fight worth fighting? Maybe it's all a misunderstanding, but can you stand to get an understanding. Or have you taken all you can stand? -L' Mo